Category: confidence coaching tips/opinions

confidence coaching tips/opinions, My thoughts

Thursday knows no bounds

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Today was a beautiful, sunny day—a perfect time to discuss limiting beliefs. Being trapped by limiting beliefs means being stuck between life’s truth and facts.


I used to doubt my writing abilities and question whether I could be an author. I also grappled with the idea that I needed to change my personality to be an effective coach.


Additionally, I struggled with feelings of inadequacy, believing that I wasn’t worthy of recognition.
These thoughts were constantly on my mind, but I decided to confront them.


I started by writing them down, and as I did, I began to see that these beliefs were not aligning with the life I wanted to lead. This realization was the first step towards breaking free from my limiting beliefs.


It made me laugh because I allowed facts, not truth, to hold me back. For example, the positive feedback I received for my blog and published books proved that my voice mattered and that I was making a difference, even if only to a few people.


My introversion, which I once saw as a limitation, has been a strength. It allows me to observe people and situations more deeply before reacting, a skill that has proven invaluable when meeting new people.


I’ve learned to embrace my true self, and this authenticity has allowed me to shine and connect with others more meaningfully.
Which self-limiting beliefs have held you back, and what steps have you taken to conquer them?

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions, Uncategorized

Happy International Women’s Day!

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Today I launch my website and Facebook group “Release Your Pain, Embrace Your Confidence”, in honor of the women who need confidence and their voice to be heard.

For I want to help them grow in self-love and confidence and find away to express themselves and feel comfortable in their own skin and Embrace that they are so much more than what others have said to them in the past and the present.

I, too, used to be so quiet that I was passed by or not seen because I didn’t want the attention if I spoke up you would see my flaws and my struggles and see where my smile didn’t reach my eyes.

You would see I was just a woman trying to get by. I was a woman trying to blend within the crowd because I wasn’t what society said I should look like. But with a life coach and doing the hard work, I found my self-love and confidence. I enhanced my voice and allowed myself to be seen, and I allowed change to happen in me and changed my body and soul. But don’t get me wrong, I have fears, and stepping up is scary and honest, but I’m doing it anyway, for I only have one life to live, and I know I can’t ignore this feeling and meaning to be more for others and myself.

Spiritually I continue to grow and mentally too and physically I still have work to do but I do it for me and those who are struggling too.

I want to help, and I will, and it will take time for trust and growth, too, but the women who need me will find me, and together, we will celebrate not just today but every moment God gives us!

I know this post is a long one but if you made it this far, here are the links to my website if you are a woman who would like to join my private and safe haven Facebook group to “Release your pain, Embrace your Confidence” with other women then send me a request on Facebook and let’s work together to make a change!

http://deirdrestokescoaching.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/7550788278266808

confidence coaching tips/opinions, Poetry

As the feeling

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Of self-doubt and uncertainty wash over me, I fear the unknown.

Like the raging wind outside, I feel all the confidence and faith of being ready in time ripped out of me.

And I want to give up and throw in the towel as the fear of being in the spotlight overpowers me.

Then God wrapped his arms around me, and I felt peace again, and hope soared through me.

And I remember what my life coach said: self-doubt is the devil, and I feel it is trying to discourage me from becoming a better me.

But also, I’m not becoming a coach for me but to help others because that’s all I’ve done and love to do.

So, as I sit here confident that I can do this and know how it feels to lack confident in myself and my voice and it suckes.

But I also know how beautiful it is to have confidence in myself and my voice and how it feels to have something to say and say it.

I want to help women be confident and find their voice because doing something different is scary on your own, but doing it with someone else feels unstoppable and alive.

For the walls that come down and the ear that listens will care, and in that moment of change, maybe you too will hear your calling or at least feel that hiding isn’t something you need to do anymore.

So I hope you all have a blessed night and I know whatever happens on March 8th with me coaching someone or not, it’s not the end, but I hope that I won’t lose faith but hold strong because my journey maybe bumpy and first I know it will smooth it’s self out eventually.🙏🏽❤️🙌🏽

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions

Today I realized

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Something when I was getting up this morning after not sleeping well, and it was a cold morning outside.

I happened to land on this short reel about the ups and downs in life. And how those ups and downs fuel you to overcome and succeed in life.

And it got me thinking about how I am waiting for my launch and struggling with being creative.

It made me realize all the things I had to go through just to be blessed with starting my blog and getting help so that I could find my voice and my confidence.

If I hadn’t gone through a bad friendship and had needed an outlet for that pain, I don’t think I would have started my blog and reached so many people.

Now, I’m dealing with uncertainties and clarity and drive for a new path, and I realize all the pain I had to go through to get here and be able to help more people soon are the reason I have the energy to keep going.

And the faith to believe and know it will all work out because I put in a lot of work, the blessing will keep coming.

The doubt, the encouragement I have received, and the strength inside of me to keep going are the fuel that will help me prepare and deliver what God needs for me to do this year.

All the things that feel like they are piling up against you are the fuel that will help me reach women who lack confidence and want to find their voice. It will also drive me to overcome my writer’s block, embrace my creativity, and keep listening to my body.

For those who need or want to read my poetry, regular posts and my help will come, and I believe the fuel to help me keep moving forward will continue.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions, Poetry

It’s so easy to

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Not change, but what I’ve realized these two years of changing.

Being more open or a better version of myself isn’t any easier.

Because the need to hesitate is still there, but I realize the need to be open and vulnerable is scary.

But I do it anyway because I feel alive. Which helps me not have the feeling that this is all I’ll amount to. After all, the lord guides me, and when I hesitate, he urges me along so I keep moving forward.

It makes me realize if I inspire just one person, I have shined my light into the world, and the more I let myself shine, the more I get to see the beauty of the world.

And receive my blessing and know the wonders I always dreamed of. This year is just a new beginning of experiencing something new, but imagine all I do this year unfolds something even better next year.

So here’s to hoping I keep embracing being more me and sharing it and confidently walking into 2024 as the new me and knowing if I keep moving, I can’t hold myself back.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions

Stuck but

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I’m still here as I get up this morning, trying to find my creativity and motivation to write anything.

I realized my limited beliefs and self-doubt have sunk in as I find my writing voice again and start being more confident in launching as a confidence coach.

First, I know I can do this, and I know what I have to say matters, even if it’s just me who hears it.

Second, my motivation to get up today and say today is my day was a self-help book, and man did it wake me up.

Because honestly, this beginning of the year has had me struggling with energy and motivation.

So, even though I have come to overcome some of the limited beliefs that were holding me back before.

We all know when doing new things, self-doubt seeks up on us like a snake and tries to bite us, so of course, we will not dare to keep moving forward.

So I have this feeling in me that I know God is telling me to do this and keep going, and when I sit quietly, what I need to say comes to me.

So, I will stay strong because I know I can do this, and I feel this is my time, and I have support.

So let’s not let limited beliefs like, “What you have to say doesn’t matter, You’re not good enough, or Who do you think you are.”

Get in our way as we walk into today. Today is sunny and windy, but it’s a great day to be alive. And I believe in you; I have your back, so let’s keep dreaming and taking each day one step at a time.

Oh and if you want to look up the book here is the name of the book, Speak by Tunde Oyeneyin.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions

Theses last

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Couple of days, I thought about and wrote about what made me gain my confidence and what made me want a new change in my life.

It had me thinking about journaling and how I use it to reflect and let go of thoughts, I may or may not share with anyone.

And when I journaled, it was short and sweet, and now it’s long, and sometimes I get it all out.

But what helped me the most is mood journaling, which has helped me work through emotions a lot better.

I tend to keep my emotions to myself because even though I trust certain people, I still have my guard up.

I’m a moody person sometimes, so knowing why and how I could have reacted next time or how I can keep track of my moods and emotions helps me keep track of what triggered me when and why.

I like journaling, even if I sometimes forget to do it all the time. It helps me keep motivated and aware because sometimes, when I’m tired or working, I may not be paying attention to how I felt the week before. After all, sleep doesn’t come easy for me.

Being under the weather this week has drained me so much that I don’t even know how little sleep I got other than I’m tired and feeling better.

But I know that I will be journaling how I felt this week and the past few days so that I know how I felt because it has been a while since I’ve been sick for a couple of days.

Also, my confidence to post and still be present on my blog has bothered me, but I realized I needed to take care of myself before writing here as I need to do my best to bring my all.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions, Quotes

Oh wow

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It’s post four, and talking/sharing my opinion on these, I know, will be connected to my exciting launch in March!

It has me feeling nervous and motivated simultaneously, as if the fear of the unknown drives me to take more risks of being open and vulnerable.

Which I know is the only way I seem to grow.

And that’s why today is all about setting goals.

I’ve set many goals, like becoming a published author three times, and each time seemed more successful, even in a small way.

But completing that goal has been so rewarding as I found my voice and shared my creativity, and to have someone other than myself enjoy my work is encouraging.

But also, I realize setting goals helps me stay focused, and sometimes deadlines make me continue to do what I said I would do.

But I know that setting goals sometimes doesn’t end in the result I want.

However, those little setbacks always help me not to give up but try again because I only have one life, and I don’t want to miss out on what feels right and the opportunity that has been presented to me.

I also knew when I invested in having a life coach I had work to do on myself as I knew my drive for the things I wanted in life was stuck, and I had no way of knowing that with me setting the goal of showing up and being consistent on working on me that I would find my backbone.

Whether that is through my words or advice or just being someone who is there to listen, I hope my setting goals and being present in life will continue to be rewarding and a shared experience.

I would awaken a voice that didn’t want to be ignored but heard, and here I am, setting a goal to become a confidence coach and realize I live to help and spread joy.

So, happy Monday, and let’s go forward and set some goals that make us all feel alive or a little bit more motivated.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions

So lets

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Talk about post three of my exciting launch in March!

So today I want to talk about routines and how having one has helped me be consistent and stay on course.

For me, if I don’t plan or have something laid out, I will most likely not get it done.

That’s why I have routines like posting a positive quote every morning here on my blog, which helps me stay motivated and inspired, but also, I want to bring some joy or awareness to others each day.

I like spreading joy or encouragement, so adding routines that keep me sharp and happy is critical to me.

That’s why I found adding meditation to my day or week helped clear my mind and feel at peace and even helped me fall asleep as my mind just listened to a calming voice or sounds.

I feel routines are excellent, and I’m working on adding more and being aware of having more structure to my life as I prepare to keep learning and growing in this life God has blessed me with.

Happy Sunday, everyone, and if you have time, I’d love to know what routines you do that help you be consistent or that you enjoy in the comments below. If not, I hope you enjoyed this post.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions

So Yesterday

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I wrote about confidence and what is means to me and how I deal with it.

Well, today is all about Negative self-talk or mean-spirited or critical thoughts in your head that when you make a mistake, it makes sure you don’t forget or question your worth or skills.

A voice that could have been started by someone else telling you that you’re not worthy or smart enough or pretty enough or skinny enough. Whatever the reason is, you have carried these thoughts with you, and they have been knocking you down.

Until you start to believe those thoughts and second guess things. And this can be damaging and lead to things like depression, OCD, PTSD and anxiety disorder and so much more.

For me, it was depression and a lot of self-doubt, and when I made mistakes, I couldn’t just let it go so quickly.

So here are some tips I use to slow down or stop my negative self-talk.

1. Odds are facts, and most of the time, can you check them if they’re not true?

2. we all make mistakes because we’re human and it’s not the end of the world. So take a deep breath and try again.

3. turn your negative self-talk into positive, so talk, for example, “This is hard, but I’ll keep trying.”

Everyone deserves a clear mind, and trust me, I’ve checked the facts of my negative thoughts before, and it was all untrue.

So go out into the world and think more positively and believe with all your heart things will get better.

So have a blessed day!

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes

confidence coaching tips/opinions, Quotes

Today is February

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First the first day of black history month!

So today, I’m kicking off with what Confidence means to me, as it will be one of the things I focus on helping women find themselves.

To me, confidence is knowing your worth and being yourself. And seeing that you are the value you are looking for when trying to validate your self-confidence.

I used to think I would be more confident if I lost weight and others saw me for me.

But I realized when I saw and felt worthy of being myself that I was being heard when I was being my authentic self.

I not only saw the beauty in me but in others, and I started to see the world in a new light.

But being confident doesn’t mean self-doubt goes away. It just means I know who I am, and I accept myself, and even if someone looks at me mean or funny, I know there isn’t something wrong with me.

I hope you enjoyed this short post, and know I will be posting different topics three days a week.

Also, the first day of my posting about my exciting launch in March.

This week, since today is day one on a Thursday, I will post tomorrow and Sunday mornings after my morning quote. And then the following weeks will be Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

I hope you all have a blessed day!

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2024 By Deirdre Stokes