Tag: Frustrated

Poetry

The year of 2023

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You showed up initially with so much hope to get things done. And I’m not going to lie; you were making some great moves and meeting deadlines, and the results were good, even with last-minute fixes.

You presented a great book.

But then you burned out, trying to do something new and uncomfortable and overwhelming that you were stuck and down for far too long.

And so you thought there was no hope or light at the end of the tunnel. And right when you were about to give up a familiar face showed you grace and offered you help and support, and like a new, energized Bunny, you were off to get things done, and wow, did you get them done.

And then you showed your wins, and another hand came out and helped you up to the next stage of your journey. You shot off like a rocket, and even in the rough turbines, you did your task and made your deadlines again.

Ultimately, the year was not all your vision, but success was there as you crossed the finish line in 2023.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes Copyrighted ©️ 2023 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Tired of

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All the things I put myself through

Just to feel close to you.

I can’t be this way for it’s tearing who I am

Part and each day I feel sadness or I’m so mad I could just scream.

I won’t know what is going through your mind.

But I can’t just keep going on like this

For it reminds me of the past and I am not that girl anymore!

I won’t settle now and I didn’t then.

My wake up call was so much sooner this time around.

So goodbye to the moments that felt so right.

Now nothing seems alright.

Just so empty and pointless.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyrighted ©️ 2020 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

So many

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Things I left unsaid

It’s like your there than your not.

And my heart drops every time.

I want scream but what good would that do

For me or for you?

And so the frustration continues

And I wonder just how bad will it be when I finally just let you have it.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2020 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

You call

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Photo by DeMorris Byrd on Unsplash

My name and I look your way

And I wait for what you have to say.

But nothing seems to come out your mouth and so you look away.

And I stare at you, for I guess I expected more.

I wait for you to turn back around just a little longer than I should have.

For you didn’t turn back or even explain why you called my name and looked my way.

But it was clear you had just wasted my time and energy.

When I had better things to do before you distracted me.

And a part of me was mad and irritated that I had even entertained the fact that you had anything to say to me.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2020 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

It’s windy

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Photo by Daniil Lobachev on Unsplash

Outside and like my life I would nice for it to just blow some things around.

Until maybe it would be in better shape then it is right now.

The things that are set in stone will be blown around and for once I would welcome a mess in my life.

Something to do for right now it feels like I’m moving around in circles and nothing seems right to me.

I’m running out of steam but I have to keep moving even when I just want to scream enough is enough.

But I know my moment in the wind won’t last and so back to the same old things in the hope of finding the right path for me.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2020 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

I feel

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Like someone is trying to throw me off as the year comes to an end.

The anger that is boiling inside of me is out of control and I don’t know how to tame it in.

Just the thought of how they are trying to play me is unfair and unfortunately a struggle for them.

I’m not sorry at this point and I will continue on with my head held up high.

I won’t allow this sneaky move to shake me up for good.

My lord won’t allow me too and so I will pray for those who do me wrong and keep doing what is best for me.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2019 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Like debris

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you are everywhere but yet not doing much.

You want to boss people around but yet can’t even do what you need to do.

You want to act as if you know it will all work out but stress about things you have no control over.

Nothing is ever good enough for you and that proves so much to me for if you had just a little more faith maybe than life would be so much better for you.

But you blame everyone else as if they are the very reason you are miserable but the truth is you are the one to blame not them but you.

It’s time you do something about your faults and do it quick for you are going to crash and burn and it won’t be pretty.

I can say we were better off without you for the stress was manageable and everyone was doing their jobs and we were a true team.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2019 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

What am I

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Waiting for as everything just goes down hill.

The frustration is strong and the demand to get it done is ridiculous.

As the anger boils up with nothing left but ashes when I’m done.

Nothing matters anymore as all I see is red and all I want is for the bullshit to end so I can walk way with a smile on my face and the termination of knowing it will not matter in the end

Tomorrow will not be worth it in the end I know I won’t be.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2019 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Seconds before

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I knew it was all going down hill because it’s like no matter how hard you worked to do what needed to be done.

There was always a mess on the other side and there is always someone else who is not satisfied.

So much going on that I just can’t take it anymore and for someone to just assume I would go along with whatever it is going on.

Just pisses me off the truth is I don’t care anymore.

I’ve fought hard and now I’m burnt out and I’m done complaining and I’m done trying to save their ass.

When they just throw mine under the bus because they can’t seem to do what needs to be done.

My eyes are open and so are my ears but there is not much more I can do other than walk way and forget all that I know.

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2019 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

What has

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this world become as people become animals.

Snapping at you like a snapping turtle because they don’t like to be questioned.

Looking at you as if your are the prey and they are predator and you have crossed over into the lions den.

When will society get their act together and start treating each other with care instead of anger.

It doesn’t matter where you work or how you live.

You are not better or above me and until you realize that you are living a life of ugliness.

And I feel sorry for you for the world is full of some good things and people if you just give them a chance.

For the thing or person your looking for to change your life may just be that person your snapped and slapped at with your words yesterday.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Copyright ©️ 2015 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

So much

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Anger boiling up inside

I feel like calm water before it starts to boil on the stove.

Then all of a sudden the water is popping in every direction.

And as you reach to down it falls at you and you jump back in surprise.

And I know if I don’t calm down my anger is going to blow in so many directions it’s not going to be funny.

The stress is getting to me and I’m not me anymore and that should be my wake up call.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Copyright ©️ 2015 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

I’m running

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Out patience to just let things slid off my back.

I don’t want to play nice anymore for it feels like I get nowhere fast.

And I suffer more when I choose to do more than I can handle.

Because I want to get all done and not worry about it the next day.

When will I stop and just walk away and let them figure it out on their own.

That’s the question I may not ever answer.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Copyright ©️ 2015 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Weak

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I feel it in my bones as I stand here being in the one place I rather not be.

Faking a smile and trying to be okay when I feel nothing but okay in this moment.

I want to do nothing but scream and the truth is no matter how much I say my frustration.

Nothing gets better and so I say nothing at all because what I have to say doesn’t seem to matter.

I am just another body even though I do good work and a lot of people see that at the end of the day they can push someone to be like me.

So what makes me any special if I can be replaced in a blank of an eye.

There will be lots of denial and lies but the end results will always be the same and with that is it worth dealing with.

An question I think I already know the answer too but, yet I am still around losing my mind all over again as if I am stuck in a loop and living my last days on earth in hell the place I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Copyright ©️ 2015 By Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

A

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leader you think you are

but, yet as I look around and see the ones fighting this battle with me.

I know you are not one of them as you stand on the sidelines pretending to be involved.

And when we are receiving praises you are the first one to say thanks as if you helped out in any way.

So look me in the eye and tell me who you think did all the hard work at the end of the day.

For I know my team and you are not a real member and the leader well we don’t need one for we work together to get it done.

We are one and the relieve we feel when seeing each other comes from knowing you are no help and we will always be in it together even when our paths go different ways in the end.

I will thank you for bringing one more good person into my life but I won’t thank you for the struggle I live with when I’m around you.

This battle I’m tired of fighting but, the end to our story and path is not over yet so until then I will not show all my cards yet.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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Poetry

How

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Am I going to top what I’ve done before to

what I can do now.

It all feels like a losing battle and no matter how hard I try the fight is always a loss for me.

I can’t always make things work on my own, and I know that I need help but, the people hanging around don’t help they just watch and let me fall.

I’m tired of catching them when they let me fall all the time. I feel like a spider shooting out web to catch them in their time of needle.

But, when one needs more assistance it’s like everyone has run to the door as a fire has just broke out.

Walking around talking and having fun but not realizing that this life they have demands certain things but, they ignore those things for working hard was not something they ever took seriously.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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