was I so scared for to begin with.
I just jumped right in and it all came back to me.
Movement wasn’t so perfect but, the feeling of doing good really brighten my day.
It felt just yesterday things were as simple and relax as today.
Oh how I wish today could last a little longer for me.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Photo by Kirill Palii on Unsplash
that when I open my eyes the quite and peaceful thoughts are not going to stay around.
When negativity can be around the corner at every turn I make.
Even though I know a bad moment can appear so quickly, I know that it’s just a moment it’s over before I know it.
So with my eyes close I allow the moment to pass so that this bad moment doesn’t turn into a bad day or a bad week.
I’m hoping all is well when my eyes open up and see the world and what it has to offer me next.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Photo by Marion Michele on Unsplash
how I needed to see this beautiful pink sky with a rainbow shining so brightly.
For lately things have been a little to down for me.
All I wanted to do was smile and laugh and be at ease when it comes to the life that I live and to not worry or wonder what will become of me after yesterday.
Today is a new day and it feels like I have been blessed with a new mindset that blows away all the things that have driven me mad or made me so frustrated.
The time to sit back and let things pass me by is gone and for that I want to see more rainbows in my life.
For the light is so much more easier to navigate through the storms then if I just let the darkness win in the end.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash
many walls I have had to break down just to get to the center of who you are.
The journey has been quite tiring but the result at the end of knowing who you are and what you stand for has been worth it.
I wish you would see how much you mean to me and those around you and you would give yourself more credit when it comes to this life that you live.
We all make mistakes but if we own up to what we did wrong and pay attention next time things would be more easy for me and you.
I know that every hole I fill back up after truly getting to know you is worth the pain of talking it through because you are so much less stressed now and you are truly living now and doubt is something you barely worry about these days.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
to play the victim again as you mess up again.
It is not my fault when you don’t want to pay attention to your surroundings.
I’ve tried to help from time to time but, at the end you slab me in the back and expect to not be corrected when you make a mistake.
The things that are going on are all important and serious in their own ways.
You don’t understand that this is how things work and instead of taking the time to see the new things blooming all around us.
You just keep seeing the things that have brought you down because you let them.
In the end you wonder back at what you did wrong and you still don’t jump and take the matters into your own hands.
You just figure you will do all that you can in the end and that will help you out when the door that was closed is now back open ready to take you hope and to a place you will truly fit in.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Photo by Nachelle Nocom on Unsplash
there with all the cold air and the snow that had fallen the day before and right now all that I can do is drink something heat to warm my soul as everything else starts to be out of whack today.
For once it’s just nice to be inside and not have to stress about what is going on outside my window right now.
I do not know when this storm will pass but I know that this precious time that I am getting doesn’t come around as much as I want it too.
So I am content with what I have to do right now inside a way from the cold for now.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
much has happen that I don’t know which way to go and which way is holding on to the things that are important to me.
Am I just wasting my time trying to wait it out at this point.
No stress and no worries sound so good right now.
But, the truth is so much more bitter than what I expected and the urge to keep fighting for something that will slowly burn on its own just doesn’t feel worthy anymore.
Repeat this and that just isn’t worth it anymore for I don’t want to live like a robot anymore and move through life on autopilot with no emotions insight.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
this time we had together was enough to last a lifetime than we would be so content.
But, would that really keep us satisfied
in the end.
Or will we grow tired of it in the end and want more.
And if we get more than will we be truly satisfied?
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
feel the fire going out as the passion
starts to go out inside of me.
I know that there isn’t much time left to save the happy feeling inside of me.
So I quickly try to find a way to gain some inspiration and hope for the best.
As the words and thoughts fly through my mind I hope the right ones will come out before the fire goes out and I feel so cold inside.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
know how much longer I can wait this out this time around.
I feel like I’m suffocating if I stay here any longer than I need to.
I didn’t think things would end up like this when we first got to know each other but,now I don’t know what to think or feel right now.
I do know I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and no matter how much time I take to think this through.
The pieces of me that were filled with the peace and love of our times together are now replaced with this hollow feeling.
It’s like everything from the last couple years just vanished and what we meant to each other just don’t exist or matter anymore.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
Photo by RAMESHKUMAR R on Unsplash
you see me now
the beauty that blinded you that day
or do you see the girl who once so full of energy
Now so drained of energy that she looks like death is near.
When will you see the hurt that I’ve be harboring inside of me for too long it seems now.
When will it be a good time to tell you how I feel and if I do will you even listen to me or grow bored with my sad life.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
out the candles as you turn a year older.
Turn off the lights as you lay down to sleep.
Close your eyes as you begin to drift off into a dream, becoming someone else as you witness a story you have just created and became apart of.
Long or short that dream may stay with you for a while until it fades from your mind like all the dreams before.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
escape the evil one
who looks like a nice person.
But, soon shows her true character
the one that tries to rip everyone apart just because you’re doing things better than her.
A snake that just wants to bite so she can show you who is boss
while she sits on her ass not doing anything.
How much more can one take being around someone so evil and how. does that person live with themselves.
Trying to take down someone who is barely rising up is like stealing candy from a baby and laughing in their face.
Who does that, she probably would or do something even worst
so my friends if you see her coming please turn the other way quickly for I wouldn’t want you to get hurt or sucked into her lies.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
books all around me but, nothing is organized in this pile of mess
But, I need to find one that I’ve been looking for and I know that if I don’t find it fast this assignment won’t turnout as great as I know it will be.
I have little over an hour left before I have to go home and get ready for work and then spend hours trying to make everyone else happy while I try to keep a smile on my face and not snap.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
I wish things were different and I wasn’t going down this path again.
I feel the cold covering my body again as the cold blows through my town.
A place I rather not be but, for the time being I am stuck here to play with those I rather now see or hear from.
I want to be in my own way and not be able to be satisfied by the end results of this one journey.
I know that wishing won’t make things happen quicker or for things to improve or move forward only action will help and right now I feel like the battle is losing on my side and I am too weak to help pick up the pieces now.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes
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