Tag: Past

Poetry

I’d like

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to say I had a reason for walking  away from you that day

and that reason is the reason I’m so happy as I am today.

I am at peace and I know my worth and my hope is that I am

as strong as I was that day, because I have so much more to face today than I had back then.

The reason wouldn’t matter to you for you saw it as a weakness at the time for walking away from you was like ending a career right when things were getting good.

But, in reality it was more like deciding that money isn’t more important than taking care of myself.

For you can’t be good at what you love to do if your mind and heart are not in the right place.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Daily Prompt: Educate

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An education is something we all want

There are things we want to learn even past the years of high school or college.

Each path we take someone educates us on the real world out there that goes beyond math equations.

And complete sentences and everything you can possibly learn while in school.

You want to learn different languages and see new places and just truly be in a place of beauty.

You want to go beyond the walls that taught you something and maybe shaped you into the person you are now.

There was maybe one or two people that believed in you and told you that you could go far and maybe you did or maybe you didn’t.

But, at the end of the day there is a memory or two that you look back at and it gives you hope that you can still learn something new now that can help you go farther in your life.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Daily Prompt: Educate

Poetry

Daily Prompt: Recite

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She stood there in front of the class ready to recite a poem she wrote.

One that was her favorite and she hoped they enjoyed it.

She took a deep breath and stated to read the poem out loud.

she could feel her voice shaking but she continued on.

And once she finished everyone clapped and the teacher asked her some questions then she sat down.

she finally let out a breath as the next person got up and talked about their self.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Daily Prompt: Recite

Poetry

Maybe

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I’ve waited too long but right now this feeling is just floating in the air and the feeling of it is so strong, I fear it will knock me right over.

My fear for this to be gone grows everyday and every night that the words are left unsaid.

I don’t know if I should say something because what if I don’t really mean it and then once said it can’t be taken back.

It’s time to truly let you back in or just let you go and move on with no ties left behind in the end.

For I can’t keep moving forward with a piece of you holding me back at the same time.

In a way I have moved on but the memories of you just seem to stay even though everyone else has already faded from my mind and heart.

Why does it seem the connection I had with you is still holding on when at times I don’t think about you at all.

Like the memories of you only happen during certain seasons of the year and other times it’s like your far from my mind and then it’s like you pop up like an email from an old I didn’t expect to hear from again.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Somethings are

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better off left alone and I felt that way when it comes to you.

But, from time to time my thoughts drift to you and I feel like I should reach out over the miles of distance that kept us from being so close again.

And just try to be your friend but, then I realize why would i want that or am I really sure I want to go down that long and lonely path again.

Something are better left alone the past whisper to me as the future shines a light down my path to help guide  me away from the things I think I want  or need in my life.

As the door closes and locks for good this time I’m truly don’t ever wonder if I made the right decision for my life is so full of joy, peace, and it feels so much more complete than before.

When there were so many holes I didn’t know if I could fill them all and so I would end up drowning from all the things pouring into the life I thought I wanted and needed at the time.

God finally showed me what I needed and wanted was not the same.

And, that I was better off with the baggage from my past out of my life.

For what I stood for now wasn’t the same and who I was

was not the same girl as before.

I needed to embrace the new me and try not to get in trouble.

 

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Daily Prompt: Paper

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Paper you used to be my go to when I had to write something down

whether it be poetry or just a thought.

I would just get this feeling and quickly I would grab a pencil and just start writing until

my heart was content.

The words would just flow from my mind on to that paper and I wouldn’t stop until I felt I had let it all out.

I still have poems on paper and read them now and then but my love for writing on paper isn’t as strong as before.

As I spend more time writing on my computer than I do with paper.

Sometimes I go back to you paper and write and write until my hands just can’t write anymore and I have to rest.

Paper you were what I used in the past and sometimes in the present and if It hadn’t started with you.

I wouldn’t have a full notebook of poems now and I wouldn’t have so many more poems on my computer either.

 

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Daily Prompt: Paper

Poetry

Past

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Sometimes I think your better left behind.

I can’t find my way if I’m looking back to see what I could have changed along the way.

If only I had….

If I just had said something

Or if only I had walked away and didn’t get involved in that situation at all.

But, then sometimes the past isn’t all that bad when you can smile and be happy to acknowledge that moment.

Like friendships that are from your past but, continue to grow to in your present.

Or something in the past you didn’t like now is a favorite of yours in the present.

Maybe I’ll keep you past and hold on to the good times but continue to grow in the present.

And look forward to the future for I got through my past and I know the present is  bringing a lot of good things my way.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

No time to looking back

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anymore for I have new hope that this will workout

for me in the end.

When the sun is shining brightly from the beginning and the peaceful feeling is washing over me today.

I know that things will look and be good for me and those around me.

I don’t have time to look back at the things I missed out on or the things in the present that are not apart of my life.

I live for the now and if you’re not apart of my present than that’s on you not me and I smile knowing that I made the best out of what I had.

And the possibilities are just starting and future holds so much for me but I’m going to focus on the present and light up everything that comes my way.

Because, this year is the battle of a lifetime and I won’t stop fighting.

Even when my hope gets low, I will just rely on my faith to carry me through it no matter what.

For I don’t have time to look back when the most important things are right in front of me.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

I used to

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think my life would end up on a path so much different from the one I’m on

but I never thought I see  the connection that grew as I aged up turn into dust

and fade away before I had a chance to mend them.

Time sometimes sneaks up on us and when it’s time to think where it all went wrong

it’s too late or the truth is not around anymore.

So you’re lost and so confused on how it all could have went so this way or maybe

you know the times you slowly but surely walked away and just maybe you thought someone would notice your gone.

But, life has a funny way of showing you just how unimportant you are when you are all alone and no one is trying to find out what happened to you.

You want to be bitter and sad and miserable but you still see the good in the world that has started to close its doors on you.

You smile and you don’t let the bad and lonely moments turn you into someone who doesn’t have some hope left in you.

That little hope keeps you going when time gets so tough that breathing seems like the last thing you should care about.

That little hope carries you on for so long that everything in the past doesn’t bother you anymore but you wouldn’t open that door to the things that don’t matter anymore.

You live with the possibility that someone will remember you and that the connections of today and yesterday will continue and not everyone will leave you.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Detach

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I detach from you and it’s the hardest thing I’ve had to do

for I’ve grown to know you and trust you.

And now I have to forget and move on as if it was all just a nightmare

and I have to wake up and just trust and believe it was not real.

I have to accept that what happened in the past is over and to live in the present

knowing your not apart of it and trusting that I can get through all on my own now.

I was angry at the end and disappointed at the same time but now I don’t remember too much but I haven’t truly forgotten you but I don’t think of you either.

Your present in my life is a thing of the path and I’ve accepted that and have grown to be a little different when it comes to handling things this time around.

I don’t think if I saw you that it would hurt but I’m sure I will recognize you and will not stop to say hello for it is best to just leave it alone.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Sometimes

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I wonder about what happened to you

but I know your future isn’t my concern anymore.

As I move on in the present sometimes you slip back into my mind

as if something just needed me to think about our time together.

But, as quickly as you come you disappear and I’m happy for the past should stay

put away for a reason.

My day is better than it was before and life is so much more simpler

I don’t say the wrong things that much now and I don’t second guess anything.

I listen to my gut and things turn out so much better.

No blinders on as I see everything so clear and I know these years will just grow with more strength and hope and happiness.

Nothing to look back on but the things that made me stronger and everything else just is blur

for I’m living for now and not worrying about the things I could have had or shouldn’t have had at in the first place.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Nightmare

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You tried to come back into my life-like a bad dream.

Your like the shadows in my room at night, only you don’t scary me anymore.

I know you are just the shadow of a t-shirt hanging in my closet.

But, as a child you were a monster reaching out to get me in my sleep.

Like a nightmare you haunt me now and then as if you can’t seem to move on in life.

For something’s are better left in the past.

Time moves on and on and the safe feeling that you are gone is always around.

But, some where there is doubt in the back of my mind.

Knowing you are just waiting around the corner.

Just to say hello, not seeming to get the hint.

All I have to say is goodbye and awake up this is just a nightmare.

I’m not really here wanting to see you.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

One Chance

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is all you get sometimes

and once you mess up.

It haunts your mind every now and then

You wished things could have been different.

But, it’s all in the past now even though it always comes back

When you less expect it.

It was a life lesson you had to learn and now you just appreciate it all and don’t do anything that would cross the line.

You keep to yourself and let only a few in and you don’t regret the things that you gave up just to wake up with a smile on your face.

You realized there is so much more to life and it’s time to just live in the moment and not want to grow up too fast.

Because, when that time is gone it’s gone and you just have to accept where you are now and make the best of it.

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

I just

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don’t know what to say anymore as the darkness swallows me whole on this Friday night.

The cold air sucks me in and no matter how much I try to find some warmth the result is not good.

I’m drowning in a frozen lake with nothing to hang onto  as I slowly sink into the water so cold, but in the end I don’t feel the cold anymore  as my last breath seems to go out.

And, then like a miracle a hand reaches into the water and saves me

and I no longer feel like there is no saving me this time.

The long day turns into an even longer night and I just want to forget about the things that I don’t have anymore.

I don’t want to feel sad about the people or things no longer around and just embrace the challenge ahead.

I realized maybe I’m ghost to most but I’m light to others and as I try to continue to shine bright.

At times my light dims out and needs time to recharge  as I shut down the things that bothered me before.

I try to face it all but this battle can’t be fought alone and so I take your hand and I hear you voice.

And I let you lead me to the saver and more stable side, where all the situations seem so much more clearer.

And the people are much more understandable, The attitude is approachable and not on high alert.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Poetry

Daily Prompt: Mistake

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I want to say it was a mistake the night the stars twinkled in the night sky

and your smile shined so bright.

The night we stayed up so late that I was so tired the next day, the time I got

to spend with you was worth a thousands nights of bad sleep.

We talked about everything and connected on so much it seemed like the time spent apart was all worth it for this moment.

How could I say this was a mistake because I’m so tired that my eyes can’t stay open for one more moment.

I would be a fool to say the loss sleep was more important than spending time with you and, to tell you the truth I’d do it all over again.

Sometimes  the word mistake isn’t needed because you were happy to spend that time doing what you love or spending it  with someone you care about and in the end the memory of the moment will live on.

Whether your still friends are not.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

Daily Prompt: Mistake