I want to step into your life like a storm that blows out all the things you thought you knew.
I want to brighten up all the darkness and anger in your life.
I want you to smile and embrace me as I deliver you from the hell you grew used to.
And I want to walk you into a life that feels like heaven, and sometimes it will rain, but letting it all out is the only way to survive this life I see us in.
So please give me a chance, and I promise I won’t hurt you, and when I give up, you will know I gave my all, for it is not easy for me to wave my white flag.
And sometimes, it can be wonderful to laugh and talk with people who relate to you.
To have an unexpected connection is excellent as you get to know someone you didn’t think you would end up bonding with.
The feeling of being happy to see them
And knowing that feeling is mutual
And connecting and still not agreeing on the same things but still coming back and talking some more.
Sometimes, heads are butted, and we feel unheard or dismissed, but sometimes, we get in our feelings because it’s harder to trust and keep friends at some point in life.
So authentic connections sometimes are rare, and when you find one, you want to hold on for dear life for you get to the point where you see through the people who are nice to you to know your business and then toss you to the side when they feel better comes along.
We still crave connection, but we become more guarded sometimes; we throw it all to the wind and let fate and destiny take the wheel as we risk putting ourselves out there. Sometimes, it pays off, and your fairytale friendship is born.
You feel the connection of her uncertainty and pain as if it’s my own.
Like reading a good book or watching a good movie, the emotions, and feelings take you on your own experience.
And the tears that fall are like those they felt when creating what you now love to listen to or read.
Walking away when the song ends is so easy for us, but for them, that’s their memories, and walking away ain’t so easy.
To be an artist is sometimes hard as this feeling of a need to write is there, but the words are not forming yet, so you wait for them to come in their time.
So the days of no words come and go until you can’t stop the flow of words hitting the paper like never before.
A piece that is not only connected to you but to everyone that reads it.
Or do I live my life and things will play out the way it’s suppose to be?
So many what if’s and what now that I’m not sure what to do next.
It’s kind of stressful trying to find my way around everything.
That a sense of giving up just creeps in and well I sometimes consider it.
But I know if I don’t at least try then what was the point of going through all of this.
Change is here and I won’t sit by and just let it walk by again and again for then I will be the reason I am not happy and that is not acceptable to me.
I knew talking him would just be a minute of his time for he was always so busy
and the time he had to give out was growing fewer these days.
I quickly said hello and then spilled out everything that I had felt and had gone through these past couple of days.
And then like lightning you were gone off to tend to the list of responsibilities you had to get done.
And in the moment I hoped you’d come back later and say something, as the day went on I tried to keep you off my mind as much as possible.
I soon lost myself in a book while listening to some music and didn’t hear you knocking on my door.
It wasn’t until my phone lite up and your name was on my scene did I pause my music and answered my phone.
You asked if I was home and I said yes, you said then open the door please and I smiled knowing you would show up tonight.
We talked as the night faded away into the morning and until we just fall asleep, the next morning I woke up and you were still around and I feared you were late for something.
So I woke you and you smiled at me and wrapped me in your arms, I leaned into you and asked if you had to be somewhere and I didn’t mean to make you over-sleep.
You smiled and said there was no place you needed to be then right here with me and that everything else could wait.
For today was ours to enjoy and explore and remember and cherish for a lifetime.
No matter how much time I try to put in between me and you
the end result is not going to look good for us.
I know the pain is eating me up inside but I just can’t bring myself
to say the final goodbye.
I don’t want to put a day or time on when my world will fall apart
I can already feel the tears falling down my face and my heart just turning
so cold and me becoming the shadow of who I used to be.
My smile becoming harder to fake as life throws me nothing but curves my way
I try to gain more strength and be strong and not fall apart this time but it’s not working out that way.
But, I just don’t know what to say to you and yet I know soon we are going to fade from each other life and maybe this time we won’t get a third chance to connect again.
All I know is I miss you and maybe things don’t have to end but talking just doesn’t seem like something we will be doing soon.
time the day wines down and it’s time to lay my head on my pillow
you pop into my mind and so much peace just falls over me.
Your more important to me then you will ever know and I don’t know
if you ever found out would you understand.
Or would you take it the wrong way and would things turn
so awkward.
I don’t want to lose you so I keep a lot to myself just to keep the peace between us
for I don’t want to fight with you anymore.
I just want to spend the time I have left with you on a good note for I’m not promised tomorrow and so I Just want this moment I have with you to be amazing.
So when I’m gone that memory would be so strong that even when you think you have forgotten it comes back so strong that you think it happened just yesterday.